This week  I attended Duck Duck Goose in Stockwell on Monday, had a practise on Wednesday, and a Monkey Toast class on Thursday.  I’ve been trying to apply the character work Jet Eveleth taught me in Copenhagen: Neutral stance, throw body part out of alignment (and let that propagate through the rest of your body), find a vocalisation that gives you a point of view.  Then, during the scene, I’ve been trying to find a Want for my character.

This was working nicely on Monday, Wednesday and the start of Thursday – I found establishing a PoV did not immediately lead to a Want and so my scenes on Monday were nice, and felt wholesome, but were a little passive.  Reaching for a Want on Wednesday meant Iost the PoV a little, and at the start of Thursday’s lesson I feel like I had a scene with both.

Then we moved on to pieces – a cut down version of the Armando – and I lost it completely, reverting back to my original self.  I think that I was expecting to be tagged out or swept at any moment and so was in a state of unconscious panic.  This surprised me – haven’t I been doing this long enough to learn to trust?  But with the Impronauts after a short while I was one of the most experienced troupe-members, and so there always was a part of me worrying.  That’s an awful rut I need to get out of immediately, because the one scene I really was happy with on Thursday was where KBF initiated as a homeless person and asked me a really long question: I took the time to absorb it, honestly and slowly replied “Yes.” and got a big laugh.  I was immediately tagged out – but that laugh was the best I got from that piece, and it was when I took a moment to give my best.

So that’s my newest motto: “I will give you my best“.  My best is when I’m slower and richer, so that’s what I’m going to give you.  And when I’m on stage, I’m going to forget that tags and sweeps are even a thing and trust my teammates.